Insomniac

I don’t know why but the feeling of butterflies in my stomach, the racing heart rate and the constant buzzing of my brain is not letting me have enough sleep. What has happened which is making me so fidgety and so anxious? He was about to be hanged but the whole poltical scenario changed after his confession was aired on the television and not only that, he named big names who were involved in drenching the soil with the blood of innocent people.

It was an anticipated event because Altaf Hussain, the leader of MQM, denied ever talking to him or knowing him and hence what would have been the reaction of those who support MQM… but alas we will never know I guess. But this has indeed created doubts and questions in the minds of those who support them that how far will he go in order to protect himself. Will he deny ever having a contact with the Rabta Committee too?

It is not just about Saulat Mirza, it is about the generations of murderers and target killers that were produced; will there be no justice for the innocent lives that were brutally murdered because MQM had differences with them? A lot of questions are raised with it. Who raised these people? Who trained them? When intelligence agencies, military forces and other law enforcement agencies had proofs and they know how their network runs, why was there such a delay? Why a military government provided for them and why did they allow them to hold a militant wing? How were they able to steal from NATO containers and why didn’t Musharraf do anything about them? Why, suddenly, military has this intense desire to get rid of them? A very valid question would be, Why were they allowed to make a militant wing and why was military not concerned about innocent people dying everyday? Why is it that the law enforcement agencies do not give a damn about the common man?

I can’t sleep. My mind is wide awake and thinking too much and I can’t just stop thinking about it…

Mera ik ik Sipahi hai Khyber Shikan…

Whose war are we fighting?

TO whom are we proudly showing our strength?!

Whose shoes are we licking?!

Maybe too many questions. But the answers are always ambiguous. The masters changed. The confused are becoming more confused. What system is this where justice is not there. And I’m not talking about the lawyers and judge’s movement. If there’s no center in life, every movement is fruitless. And we surely have left that centre a long time back…

The soldiers are fighting a war, they don’t know for whom. Their attacks bring down men of their own. Their lives becoming burdened by the blood they shed of the innocent. They have lost the centre and they have lost the direction and thus they lost their souls to the devil. The devil who watches them from the shadows of their hearts and laughs at them calling on God that,’look, as I’ve promised I’ve made them my fellow dwellers of Hell.” And men, succumbing to the darkness of their souls and hearts feel themselves lost in the world of glamour and drinking deeply of the presentness rather than the consequences…

News flickered on TV from the Khyber Agency. The news people calling them the local “Taliban”. Then the news showed the “shuhada conference” from Islamabad. It’s been one year. One whole year since the Lal MAsjid Incident…

“Mera ik ik Sipahi hai khyber shikan” – the national song blared on the radio. The song mocking the bravery of the soldiers. The soldiers who proudly brought down Lal Masjid. The soldiers that killed innocent women and children. The soldiers that never had the courage to even give those girls, children a proper burial. These are the soldiers who are as strong as the fort of Khyber, stronger than Khyber that they can actually pull it down, break it up.

There were soldiers once, who tied bombs onto themselves and used to lie down the enemy tanks so that those tanks wont touch the sacred soil of their country. There were soldiers once who would give lives just to protect their country, their people. People used to encourage their kids to go into Army and be the one who’d have sleepless night watching the borders ir country… to let their kids on the wall so that the country sleeps soundly under the safety blanket. But now… now… they’re not soo sure…

It all comes down to one thing: When the “Centre” goes, everything else goes with it.